


We Need To Talk

by AndiMackmeetsHeathers



Category: Andi Mack (TV)
Genre: Angst and Hurt/Comfort, Angst with a Happy Ending, Confrontations, F/M, Light Angst, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-06-30
Updated: 2019-06-30
Packaged: 2020-05-18 19:46:29
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 8,114
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19341364
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/AndiMackmeetsHeathers/pseuds/AndiMackmeetsHeathers
Summary: After seeing Cyrus so upset for almost two weeks, Buffy takes matters into her own hands and confronts TJ-only to discover he's not the one in the wrong.Why couldn't Cyrus be happy? Was it too much to ask for?"Listen here, TJ. We need to talk.""I'm gay.""TJ, do you like Cyrus?""Kira. We need to talk. Now.""Do you realise what you've done?"





	We Need To Talk

**Author's Note:**

> So this is how Buffy handles situation After seeing Cyrus upset and jealous about TJ and Kira. She just wants Cyrus to be happy again. Sorry it's so long, I didn't intend it to be initially! Enjoy it, regardless, anyway!

"Hey, Buffy, want to join me at the track later? Then I was thinking we could go to the Spoon with Jonah, Andi and Cyrus. How does that-" 

Buffy was rushing down the corridor, flustered and stressed out, with Marty by her side. 

"Sounds great, Marty, but we'll discuss it later, okay?" 

Buffy squeezed his hand to display that she did care about Marty was saying, despite not being so hot on public displays of affection, and they were far and few between in the last week, mainly due to busy schedules. 

Marty looked confused. 

"I don't understand. Where are you going? What's up?" 

Buffy sighed as she moved and rolled her eyes. Boys. Honestly. Why were they so oblivious sometimes?

"Geez, well let's see, Marty, shall we? My best friend, according to Jonah Beck, is supposedly crying in the boys' toilets. Believe me, I have a reason to act like this right now. I should be angry. No, scratch that, furious."

Buffy frowned, imagining Cyrus, who usually acted like everything in his life was alright, letting his guard down in a locked cubicle, Jonah trying to comfort him. Cyrus had apparently calmed down considerably since Jonah's first visit, which was in the space of the past five minutes, but it didn't prevent Cyrus from crying in the first place. Taking this into consideration, she gritted her teeth. 

"I am furious. Cyrus doesn't deserve to be treated as though he's....I don't know...." Buffy articulated, attempting to discover the word she was looking for. "Disposable. Like he can just be thrown away and replaced, just like that." 

Buffy snapped her fingers to demonstrate to Marty, who was as confused as ever, the poor thing. 

"Why did he do that?" 

Buffy shrugged. 

"I don't know. But I'm going to get to the bottom of it if it's the last thing I do, I swear. He won't get away with this. Nobody, and I mean NOBODY, gets away with upsetting my best friends. They don't and he most certainly won't, believe me." 

"Buffy, stop, calm down." Marty urged her, accustomed by now to her defensive nature when it came to those she cared about. "You told me about his redemption. I saw it for myself in class a few days ago, and I've seen it multiple times. You say he's gone to a lot of effort to become a better person. Why would he just throw that all away for some girl?" 

Buffy bit her lip, deep in contemplation. 

"Huh. This is a rare occasion, celebrate it, because you might actually be right, Marty from the Party. He's not like that. I've seen him change. We were friends until Costume Day occurred. He's been spending s ton of time with Kira recently, which put Cyrus off. It won't last, though. I told Cyrus that. She's a really mean person. I mean, why her? She'd just be a bad influence on him, surely?" 

Marty shrugged. 

"You don't know his motives." 

"But I soon will." Buffy informed Marty determinedly. 

Suddenly, she heard a buzz and checked her phone. She had received a message from Andi, reassuring her Cyrus was okay, but still quite sad and apologetic, and Jonah telling her that Cyrus felt embarrassed and sished he could be hanging out with TJ again. 

"That's it. I'm finding him." 

"What, now?" 

"No, tomorrow." Buffy remarked sarcastically. "Yes, now, you dumbass. And I'd prefer it if you didn't follow me. In fact, I'd really appreciate it. The U.S.." 

"But I'm your boyfriend." Marty insisted. 

Buffy sighed and looked at Marty softly. 

"I know. I'm sorry, I truly am. But this needs to be done. Cyrus deserves a world of happiness, and this isn't bringing this to him. I need to do this alone." 

Buffy bit her nails nervously, before continuing. 

"You do understand, don't you?" 

Marty nodded and smiled, punching her in the arm fondly. 

"Okay, but if I find out you've gotten yourself into hot water, I won't be best pleased." 

"Fair enough." Buffy chuckled, waving goodbye to Marty as she continued on her mission to track down TJ Kippen. 

He'd regret this. She'd make sure of that, no doubt about it.

TJ was having a relatively normal day. Or, at least, in his new sense of normal. This consisted of Kira meeting him at his locker, him desperately searching for Cyrus in the canteen, wishing he could go back to the days he would give him a chocolate chip muffin every morning, meet up with him in the library, at his locker or at the Spoon, and sometimes on the swings. 

That had changed, now. He had to pretend to enjoy making idle chatter and idle talk with Kira and her annoying friends. He remembered painfully with a wince the way he'd called Cyrus annoying at the swings when they were bickering. Cyrus could never be annoying. These girls were. He wanted to be at the swings with Cyrus. Yet he'd ended up there with Kira. She'd dragged him about everywhere. He hated it. Take a conversation from earlier.

"Soooo TJ, what are you like, up to, like, tonight?" Stephanie, a girl with sunshine blonde hair and sapphire eyes, had asked TJ, her pink lipstick glaringly obvious as she twirled her hair round her finger, chewing gum. 

Was she flirting with him? She was, wasn't she? Great. Just what he needed, he'd thought. He told her he was busy. It wasn't a lie. He was. 

And now he was playing basketball with his friends and Kira was twirling her hair at him. Could she just stop it? 

Kira leaned in. 

"TJ?" 

"Yeah?" 

"Can you please stop acting all sad? Don't want people getting the wrong, impression, now, would we?" 

"Firstly, that's the right impression in my eyes, and secondly, there's no 'we' about it. This was all on you. You're just manipulative and annoying. I never wanted this. Any of this." 

Fury flashed in Kira's eyes. She pulled him aside, grabbing his arm forcefully, her grip strong, and looked him straight in the eyes, more intimidating than she'd ever been before. 

"Listen, TJ-" 

"KIPPEN! WHERE ARE YOU?!" a voice yelled from the door, getting closer by the second. 

He recognised that voice. It was Buffy Driscoll. 

He was done for.

"Listen here, TJ. We need to talk." Buffy announced loudly.

"Um, I don't think now would be-" 

"That's not an offer. It's a demand. You're coming with me." 

Kira death glared Buffy. 

"He's with me." 

"Not any more, he's not." Buffy responded, forcibly dragging TJ away. 

TJ glanced between them, confused, but relented and left Buffy drag him away, Kira staring in shock in the mean time at Buffy's sheer will and strength. She dragged him outside, on to a picnic bench and glared at him menacingly. 

"Buffy, I've had an awful few weeks. Please don't make things worse for me."

"You think you've had it awful? Stop being so selfish, TJ. What about Cyrus, huh? He's so miserable without you. You really hurt him. He feels like he can't spend time with you anymore." 

"I didn't mean to." 

"Wel, you have, so he has spent the last five minutes in the toilets, crying." 

TJ felt nauseous with guilt. What had he done? He began to tear up.

"I'm sorry." 

"Sorry doesn't cut it." 

"Look-" 

"Do you realise what you've done? Sorry really doesn't cut it. You have to prove it if you want Cyrus back, presuming you do." 

"I do." 

"You have a funny way of showing it." 

"I can't help it." 

Buffy frowned in confusion. 

"What do you mean?" 

"It's Kira's fault." 

"Why are you blaming her?" 

"Some of this is my fault-but I wouldn't done this, had she not put me up to it." 

"Put you up to what?" 

TJ gesticulated around him, evidently frustrated.. 

"This. The situation I'm currently stuck in." 

"I don't get it. What did she do?" 

TJ took a deep breath, blinked a few times for good measure, and began, grateful Buffy trusted him enough to be willing to actually hear him out.

"When Kira approached me, asking me if I wanted to do a costume with her on Costume Day...I refused. Twice. But, you know, she kinda got into my head a little bit." TJ stared at his hands, unwilling to meet Buffy's gaze.

"A lot, actually." 

Buffy leaned towards TJ. 

"What did she say?" 

"She said to me, 'so you'd rather do a costume with Cyrus, than with me? Okay. Have fun with that.' I know what you're thinking; that it doesn't sound too bad. And it doesn't, if you don't read into it too much. But I knew what she as trying to say, subtly." 

Buffy's eyes widened with realisation, which TJ picked up on. 

"She implied it was weird that you'd rather do a couple's costume with a boy, than with a girl, didn't she?" 

How could she do that? That was on a new level of low. Needless to say, Buffy was furious.

"Yeah. It made me feel really insecure. When she told me to 'have fun with that', I picked up on the inherent, true meaning of what she'd told me-if I didn't do a costume with her, she'd o-" TJ's voice broke. 

Buffy grabbed TJ's hand and gave it a squeeze. 

"She'd out me to the school." 

"But you're not-" 

"I'm gay." 

"TJ." 

TJ looked up, blinking fast, tears in his eyes. When he spoke, his voice as both emotive and soft. 

"Hi." 

"How long have you known?" 

TJ shrugged. 

"For a while now. It hasn't exactly been a walk in the park, to say the least." 

"I'm so proud of you. It takes a lot of bravery to come out to somebody, and I'm really glad you chose to do so." 

The two shared a smile, and TJ thanked her, before speaking himself. 

"Buffy, I'm scared. I feel weird...different." 

Buffy laughed lightly as she experienced dejá vu, remembering suddenly having the exact same conversation with Cyrus a year ago.

"TJ Kippen. Look at me." 

He obliged, albeit somewhat reluctantly.

"You've always been weird. But you're no different." 

TJ bit his lip and drummed his fingers idly on the table in front of him, his nerves tangible. 

"But, the thought of telling anybody else..." 

TJ took in his surroundings, the students playing sports games, chatting, reading, reviding, doing homework. 

"You'll be fine." Buffy reassured him. 

TJ nodded shakily. 

"Thanks, Buffy, for listening to what I have to say instead of drowning me out. And for being so deserving and understanding." 

"No problem." Buffy grinned. "Just one quick question, though."

"Go ahead. Shoot. Knock yourself out the park." 

"How did she figure it out?" 

TJ started to bite his nails, yet another revealing nervous tic of his.

"He saw me. With someone. And figured out I liked this guy, based off just one interaction. Though, I admit, I was far from subtle." 

Buffy grabbed his hands from across the picnic bench. TJ averted his gaze, and suddenly his Converse trainers were the most interesting thing in the world. Buffy let out a small gasp as the cogs worked in her mind. 

"TJ, do you like Cyrus?" 

TJ met her eyes, with a look of vulnerability about him which exposed his emotions. He was finally letting his guard down. 

He could trust Buffy, couldn't he? A voice in the back of his mind attempted to persuade him otherwise. He thought he could trust Kira. And Cyrus thought he could trust TJ. Look how wrong he'd been there. 

Cyrus. God. To say that TJ felt ashamed and guilty would be the understatement of the millennia. Cyrus was best person he knew, and would probably ever know. Cyrus meant the world to him. Yet, he'druined their relationship. Classic TJ, anything good, he had to ruin it. He felt like he was drowning, with nothing to keep him afloat. 

Cyrus had been avoiding him. TJ didn't blame him. And now he was crying. Because of him. The guilt he felt was immense. He just wanted to hug Cyrus And explain the situation to him. How could he, though? He'd be revealing his crush on a straight guy. And he did like him, more than Buffy could ever possibly know. 

You could even say that TJ loved Cyrus. TJ's breath caught in his throat. That's why he didn't want anybody to find out. Cyrus would hate him, and he'd lose the guy permanently.

"Do you promise not to tell anyone?" 

"I promise. But you need to show Cyrus how much you care about him; it's something he is constantly underestimating." 

"How do I do that?" 

Buffy thought about it, but her mind just went blank. 

"I'll think about it. In the meantime, don't give up hope with him, okay?" 

TJ nodded and smiled at her.

"He means a lot to me. He's amazing, caring, kind, hilarious and adorable. He's always there for me, literally no matter what, and constantly forgiving and willing to give me a second chance. He brings out the best in me. His patience and generosity have really rubbed off on me over the past few months. He's like an angel, with his breathtaking smile, and that little giggle he does which drives me wild. Also, have you seen his gorgeous eyes?" TJ blurted out, surprised by the sheer amount of words spilling out of his mouth.

Buffy shot TJ a look of surprise and he looked down, embarrassed and blushed. 

"Carry on, if you must." Buffy encouraged with a trading smile. 

TJ smirked and continue, more confident in his words by now, at this point, than ever before.

"He's so talented and intelligent. And we've had a ton of fun together. I honestly don't know how I'd manage without him in my life. I don't just want him back in my life, Buffy; I need him like I need air to breath. He's the best thing that has ever happened to me and I'm certainly not prepared to ever, and I mean ever, lose him again." 

"Wow. TJ. I never knew you could be like this. You're so committed and dedicated to Cyrus." 

TJ shrugged casually, a hint of a smile playing at his lips and his face painted pink with a suggestion of a blush.

"That's what love is about, isn't it? Sacrifices, whether big or small. Significant, or seemingly insignificant. Dedication and commitment to one another. To be close and open, to communicate but still be able to have fun, be serious and intimate, but playful and loving. To give and take from each other in equal amounts. To give each other a purpose, and to promise your hearts to each other. It's about knowing you can trust each other and be there for each other, no matter what circumstances are inflicted upon you in life." 

TJ winced. 

"Shame my crush never got off the ground." 

Buffy started at TJ in shock at the profound and deep nature of his wise words. When she'd cornered him almost fifteen minutes ago, she'd never expected to be confronted with this, and now she didn't know how to react. She'd also just come to the terms with the fact that the way Cyrus acted around TJ may have not been entirely platonic, after all.

"Just give this a chance, okay? See how it goes. Any guy would be lucky to have you, anyway." 

Buffy placed a hand on TJ's shoulder as she spoke. TJ gave her a dazzling grin, feeling the knots in his stomach loosen and the tension dissipate a little, breathing out a sigh of relief. He checked his watch rapidly. 

"Shoot! Look at the time! Sorry, Buffy. I gotta go! I'll text you later. See you around!" 

Bemusedly, Buffy waved him goodbye as TJ ran off like a madman into the distance.

He had a basketball game to continue playing.

And Buffy had a score to settle. 

With Kira.

Buffy was livid. Both TJ and Cyrus had been mistreated at the hands of Kira. She'd manipulated TJ and threatened to out him against his will, purely to hurt Cyrus' feelings, she'd figured. 

Why would she do that? 

Then it hit Buffy. 

To get back at her for kicking her off the basketball team.

This was all it was about: revenge. 

The queen of the monarchs (the basketball team Kira was formerly on) had found her king, and degraded Cyrus to no less than a pawn in her twisted little chess game. TJ was about to be, too. Or maybe he was, all along. 

After all, like Queen Elizabeth I, not all queens needed a king by their side. 

Buffy clenched her fists as the mental image of Cyrus, sobbing in the toilets, entered her mind. Poor Cyrus. He'd done nothing wrong, whatsoever. Yet he'd still been caught up in this elaborate spider's web, a tangled mess of lies and deception. 

He was an innocent guy, with nothing in his heart but love to give. He was always giving, never taking. That was his nature. Where did it get him? Heartbroken and jealous over some oblivious fourteen year old basketball player. Why couldn't Cyrus be happy? Was it too much to ask for? She just wanted her incredible best friend to have the happiness and joy he deserved in his life. Buffy's eyes pricked at the injustice of it all.

The more that Buffy thought about it, the more she believed that Cyrus genuinely harboured romantic feelings towards TJ. That would explain his jealousy and his misery, and why he was willing to hear TJ out after Costume Day. He wouldn't have gone to those length, otherwise, and definitely wouldn't have tried to present TJ with a shirt. Not to mention, come to think of it, how eagerly he'd agreed about the aforementioned shirt bringing out TJ's eyes. Piecing the puzzle together, it was easy to see that Cyrus definitely liked TJ back. 

She had to get them back together after all this drama. The only question was how. 

Firstly, however, Buffy needed to prioritise going off on Kira.

Kira had been waging a silent war against Buffy, and TJ and Cyrus had been caught in the crossfire in the process. Buffy gritted her teeth determinedly. That bratty little witch was going to pay for this, if it was the last thing Buffy did. 

"Kira! Come over here!"

Kira sent Buffy such a sharp death glare that even Buffy felt a chill down her spine. She shuddered, but stood her ground all the same. 

Kira placed her hands on her hips. 

"Why exactly do I have to submit myself to you and your sad little life?" 

Buffy went to approach Kira, but fortunately thought better of it and stopped in her tracks, squeezing her eyes shut. Kira was simply attempting to get a rise out of her. She couldn't take the bait. It was s sign of weakness, plain and simple. 

"You heard what I said." 

Kirs moved closer. 

"And what if I don't want to?" 

"Oh, you will." 

"Will I?" Kira asked passive aggressively, walking closer and closer to Buffy as she spoke. 

Buffy nodded in confirmation. Kirs laughed, touching up her hair. 

"Yes, you will." 

"You can't make me." 

Just ignore her, Buffy told herself mentally. It will be fine. Don't worry about her attitude. You'll soon get past it. Buffy took a deep breath and spoke again. 

"Kira. We need to talk. Now." 

Perhaps it was the urgency Buffy spoke with, or the anger lacing her voice, but Kira followed he four of the gym. 

"What do you want, Driscoll?" Kira snapped irritably, tapping her foot impatiently.

"I think we both know what this conversation is about." Buffy hissed, her voice dangerously low. 

Her patience had worn thin, at this point. Kira rolled her eyes in response and crossed her arms, folding them across her chest defensively. 

"I did nothing wrong." 

Buffy threw her arms up in the air, frustrated. 

"You did everything wrong!" 

"I don't know what you mean." Kira bluffed. 

"I think you do, Kira. I really think you do." 

"Look, I got him to do a costume with me and we've been hanging out together a lot recently. Is that honestly such a crime?" 

"No. It's the way you went about it and the people caught in the cross fire and made upset and miserable. Poor Cyrus is heartbroken, sobbing his eyes out over TJ. And as for TJ...well, you've seen him. You know how sad he feels. He thinks he's lost Cyrus forever. He's really smitten with him, you know." 

"I do know. Why do you think I said what I did to him if I didn't?" 

"But why, Kira? Why would you manipulate a guy in to doing things for you if he never wanted to do them in the first place, by attempting to use his own sexuality against him?" 

Buffy shook her head, trying to make sense of the blurred mess this had all become.

"I-" Kira looked down, scuffling her feet against the wooden floor beneath her, before she looked back up at Buffy. "Don't actually know.. " 

"Are you insecure? Is that it?" 

"No! Of course not! Why would you even think that for a second? That's ridiculous!" 

"Then why are you getting so defensive?" Buffy challenged her.

"Because I'm allowed to dispute lies, that's why, Buffy Driscoll." Kira scoffed, unconvincingly.

Buffy raised an eyebrow at the girl, unimpressed by her deceptive nature.

"Sure." 

"I'm not!" Kira practically shouted, beginning to become riled up by now. 

Someone who wasn't insecure wouldn't have reacted like that, Buffy mused. She wondered if her behaviour came from a darker place, like how srornfly TJ used to guard himself because of his own insecurities about himself. Kira's home situatiin may have a role to play in this, but she wasn't going to push talking about that. Not yet, at least. 

"Okay. Okay. Calm down, Kira." Buffy raised her hands in the air in surrender. "It was a tactless question, I'll admit it. Sorry about that. Anyway, that's not the point. When you teamed up with TJ on Costume Day, just what exactly were you expecting to come out of this?"

"I wanted a place on a basketball team. Is that too difficult?" 

Buffy shook her head vigorously.

"No, it's not when you approach it with the right mentality, the right attitude." 

"I did!" 

"You didn't. You messed up." 

"You're the one who called your team-as the captain of said team, of all people-a hot mess." 

"So now we're playing the blame game, huh?" 

Kira shrugged. 

"Just being honest with you here, Slayer." 

Buffy sighed and pinched the bridge of her nose in despair.

"I was in the wrong. I'll admit it. Yet you couldn't admit what you'd done was wrong, bragging about your own abilities and generally being a horrible team member and overall nasty person. Besides, is that really the right way to treat a team you want a position in? And the way you spoke to me. Someone deserving of a place on this team would never speak to me like that. And then, there was the team captain of the boys' team. Who the hell do you think you are, exactly, alienating us both?" 

"I don't know what you mean." Kira cut in, panicking. 

"Yes, you do." 

"Inever actively attempted to alienate anybody! I just wanted to fit in!" 

"Well that's what you did, Kira-you alienated us. You tried to flirt with him to get on the team, then realised he's gay and decided to use it against him, to upset my best friend, which you know would hurt me and would be revenge for me not letting you on the team. Next time you have an issue with me, don't involve other people, innocent and good people at that. Life isn't your game of chess and people have real emotions. When will you finally learn and understand that, Kira?" 

Surprisingly, Kira began to blink back tears, but Buffy wondered whether they were authentic or not. She leaning more towards the latter, being accustomed to Kira's deceptive behaviour.

"Now that you put it like that...I can see how I was selfish, because I was thinking about what I wanted and not them. I could tell TJ was gay straight away; he wasn't exactly subtle about his feelings for Cyrus. That kid really is oblivious." 

"And TJ is, too." Buffy added, as everything began to add up in her head. 

Kira's eyes widened as she realised what Buffy meant. 

"I've ruined something special, haven't I?" 

Buffy sighed, pinching the bridge of her nose. 

"You should have just left it, Kira. Let them be together for Costume Day without threatening to out an innocent guy to the school against his will. Cyrus is really upset, you know-he thinks you're a couple." 

"Well, technically, we do look like one." 

"Except for the fact that he's gay." 

Kira nodded, letting the guilt she'd been holding back consume her. 

"Is there anything I can do to help?"

Buffy stared at Kira in surprise for a few seconds, wondering that perhaps Kira could be the solution to the very problem that she'd concocted in the first place. Several seconds later, she spoke. 

"I think perhaps you can talk to TJ. Maybe Cyrus, if possible. You won't have time now, of course, but you could definitely do it after school." 

Kira mulled this over in silence, her face taking on the look of concentration it usually did when she was analysing people's facial expressions and conversations. 

"You're right. I don't think he'll want to open up to me, but you're right, Driscoll."

Buffy smirked triumphantly. 

"When am I not right?" 

Kira shook her head. 

"Probably many times!" 

"Oi!" 

Buffy nudged Kira lightly and they both began to laugh. It actually felt good, stood here laughing with Kira. Was Buffy okay? Had she got a fever and become temporarily mad? Buffy placed a hand on her firhwad, just to check. Nope, she was fine. 

Yet somehow, she could sense that when it came to Kira's life, it wasn't. People never acted like this out of pure spite. There was always something deeper going on with them, for example Amber and her turbulent home life, or TJ and his dyscalculia. 

"Kira?" 

"What is it?" 

Buffy's voice softened considerably. 

"Is there something going on in your life that's making you act out like this? Nobody acts like this with purely spiteful intentions, after all." 

Kira looked upwards, averting her eyes from Buffy. An uncomfortable silence settled over them before she responded. 

"Maybe there is. Can we meet up tomorrow after school to talk about it? I kind of need somebody to open up to." 

Buffy was taken aback. Kira, open up to her? She never thought she'd see the day. Despite herself, she remembered how Amber and TJ had both been redeemed and forgiven, and felt as though one day she could have the heart to forgive this girl, but only one condition. 

"Sure. As long as you sort everything out between TJ and Cyrus." 

"I will." Kira promised. 

They both went to leave. 

"Oh, and Buffy?" 

"Yeah?" 

"Thanks for this. I really appreciate it. What you said about having empathy for others got to me. I've never been shown any...my home situation is a little difficult, to say the least. I've never really trusted anybody before, and TJ was a definite escape, you know? An interesting and fun guy I have common interests with. But if that means destroying another relationship, perhaps it's not worth it in the end. I've seen the chemistry between them. They'd make a great couple." 

Buffy smiled softly.

"They would...and they both deserve happiness, after what they've been through." 

Kira looked confused. 

"You'll find out when you talk to them later. I'll see you around, Kira." 

"See you around, Driscoll." 

With that, the bell rang, signalling the end of lunch, and they both parted and went their separate ways, and Buffy had renewed hope for Kira.

It was after school, and the image of Cyrus walking away from Kira and TJ after he insisted on leaving still replayed in his mind, like a song constantly playing on repeat. Cyrus was his best friend. He was irreplaceable, in TJ's eyes. But was Cyrus capable of seeing that? No. He constantly underestimated just how much people cared about him. 

Especially TJ. 

TJ was desperate to talk to him, especially after his conversation with Buffy at lunch earlier. Did Cyrus even want to see him? Cyrus hated him for picking his best friend's enemy over him, didn't he? TJ wouldn't blame him. He wasn't particularly a huge fan of himself either. 

Before he could begin wallowing in self pity and misery, however, a familiar and unwelcome face appeared at the door of the Spanish classroom they TJ was leaving. 

Perfect. Exactly what he wanted.

"Kira? What are you doing, waiting for me outside of class? People will think we're a couple or something. Just for clarification, we're not." 

"I know. And I'm allowed to stand here, there's no law against it or explicitly forbidding it, is there?" 

"Wow, how intelligent. You must be so pleased with yourself." TJ quipped sarcastically, rolling his eyes. 

He could almost physically feel himself putting his guard up. The only person he could truly be himself with Cyrus, and he was gone. The thought made TJ feel sick. 

"Yeah, well. We need to go." 

"What if Cyrus sees us?" 

"He'll soon realise we're not a couple, when I'm done." 

"Kira, what do you mean?" TJ asked, furrowing his eyebrows as Kira grabbed his hand with urgency and dragged him off somewhere.. 

"We need to talk." 

"Kira, could you please stop being so cryptic already and actually tell me what the he'll is going on right now?" TJ almost shouted in his frustration and bewilderment, earning the pair a few curious glances aimed in their direction.

"Keep it down. You heard me. Like I said. We need to go talk." 

"About what?" 

"About the manipulation. About your feelings about the situation. About you and Cyrus." 

TJ felt his heart beat quicken and his breath caught in his breath at the mention of Cyrus, but scolded himself for getting distracted. The main piece of information to focus on was the fact that Kira's words seemed almost caring and compassionate. What had gone on? Had somebody finally spoken sense to her? Who'd put her up to this? 

As they walked across to the basketball court, it hit TJ who had spoken to her. Only one person knew, of course, and that was...

Buffy.

"Are you just talking to me because Buffy asked you to? Or because you genuinely care about my hurt feelings and broken relationship with Cyrus?" 

Kira winced, as though she'd just been slapped, and TJ concluded that it must have been something in the tone; his defensive nature, his anger, his sadness, his fear and his pain, all mixed together to form the words that came tumbling out of his mouth. 

"Both. But mainly the latter. Look, Kippen. What I did to you and Cyrus-you don't deserve it. Either of you. And you never did. I was being selfish, because I wanted to get back at Buffy, to get a place on the baksetall team, and to look cool and fit in to push down my insecurities. I wasn't particularly nice, even form the beginning. I was pushy when it clearly made you uncomfortable. When I figured out that you were, well, you know-" 

"Gay." TJ finished for her. 

Kira gaped at him in surprise. 

"I came out to Buffy earlier. I don't feel so scared admitting it, anymore. It's just part of who I am and I'm slowly learning to be okay with it." TJ added with a small smile. 

Kira felt an unexpected swell of pride in her chest-she had been hanging iit with this guy quite frequently recently, after all-before moving on.

"I used it against you, as you know, which was immoral and wrong. Manipulative, some would say. Others would even go as far as to say...slightly homophobic, making you feel guilty for who you had feelings for." 

"Yeah, it was really messed up." 

"I kind of knew that at the time, but the worst thing is, I ignored it, and all the emotions getting involved, alternatively opting to use my head and my brain, my logical side, instead of my heart. Which, in the end, got not only one but I'd argue two, hearts broken in the process."

"You can say that again," TJ murmured dolefully. 

Kira placed a hand in TJ's shoulder in what she hkord would be a somewhat comforting matter. She wasn't brilliant with the whole reassuring, listening to people and being all nice with them thing. She could get used to it over time. Who knew what the future held for her? 

Kira was getting distracted. She needed to focus on the present, and the matter currently at hand. 

"TJ. I've seen the way you look at him, and I know what the two of you have is special. I turned up one day, uninvited and interrupted that. Yet he still carried on returning to you. He really cares about you, you know." 

"Even if he did, I doubt he'll talk to me again for a while." TJ interjected bitterly. 

"Hey, don't think like that. Anyway, I forced you into a relationship you didn't want and forced you out of one you didn't want. That wasn't my finest hour, I'll be that honest. I tried to get your attention on me for to my own insecurities after he years of racism and sexism which I'd been growing up with years prior. I needed acceptance and I needed to upset Buffy. You were the perfect person to do that with." 

"So, you completely disregarded not only my feelings, but more importantly, Cyrus', too." 

"When you put it like that..." 

"It's true. And your actions have consequences, you know." 

Much to TJ's surprise, Kira's eyes began to well up. Wow, she truly was a sentient human being. Who would have guessed it?

"I know. And I've made a massive mistake. I should have never taken any of it out on you, either of you. You deserve happiness, genuinely, as does Cyrus and I hope that one day in the not-so-distant future, you find it."

TJ smiled.

"Thanks, Kira. At least you're owing up to it. It takes courage and development. You have the potential to be a good person one day, Kira. I believe in it and I, surprisingly, believe in you. You should try it some time." 

"I will." 

"I just have one question for you." 

"Sure, what is it?" 

"Why did you even do it in the first place?"

Kira sighed heavily. 

"I wanted to fit in. I've experienced a lot of racism in the past, when I lived down south. I got a lot of horrible messages, people using racial slurs frequently yo describe me, and it was a sexist place, too. Females were brought down, not empowered. They were taught they'd live their lives cooking meals and looking after children. A lot of people would tell us to 'go back to the kitchen.' It was awful." 

Kira squeezed her eyes shut breiflfy, before continuing. 

"Some of us attempted to advocate for change, but we were punished quickly for it. I was brought into the head's office. As were two other girls. And they were both non-white, too. The racist abuse was abundantly prevalent, but nobody cared enough to do anything about it. Either that, or they were just as bigoted. I faced a lot of prejudice. It was difficult. My Mom left not long after. She'd had enough of it, apparently. Enough of us." 

Tears rolled down Kira's face and TJ squeezed her hand, his voice and face gentle and caring.

"I'm sorry." 

Kira shook her head.

"Don't be. It's not your fault. My Dad took it badly, turned to alcohol. I had to look after my little sister. It wasn't easy. Basketball quickly became my escape. It reminded me of my Mom. It was her thing, Back in the day, and I'd always had a natural flair for it. When I was playing the games, I wasn't Kira, the black girl, I was Kira, the basketball champion. It did tons for my confidenc. It felt great. But it got to my head. When I moved here, I was overly confident in my ability, hence why Bufy kicked me off the team. For being a bad team player. She was right to do it, I guess, in hindsight. I was mad and wanted revenge." 

"So, you flirted with me to secure yourself a position on the boy's basketball team, picked up on the fact that I was into guys, and used it against me, hurting both Mr and Cyrus in an attempt to get back at Buffy?" TJ guessed. 

"Yeah. Not exactly my proudest moment, was it? I thought you were cool, you know-TJ Kippen, captain of the basketball team. You had a good reputation that I thought I was helping to rescue on Costume Day." 

"A deluded belief." TJ commented contemptuously.

"I know. People were hurt, and it was all my fault. You're still coming to terms with your sexuality, aren't you?" 

"Yeah. It's not easy, but I can cope with it." 

"If there's one thing I've learned about you, you're both resilient and brave. You'll manage this. Come to think of it, though, the main thing to take out of this is to treat others respectfully. I took my pain and insecurities out on others and damaged them. Im sorry. Could you ever find it in your heart to forgive me, TJ?" 

TJ considered this briefly.

"Possibly one day. I'm a fairly forgiving person. I know what it's like, learning from your mistakes. I've been there before." 

TJ explained about his redemption and journey to forgiveness, and added about how things with Kira could possibly turn out in a similar way. He also told her he hoped her home situation improved, and took that into consideration when it came to whether or not he should forgive her.

"We'll see. We're both still upset, Cyrus and I. I feel awful about the fact that he was crying. Over me. I couldn't believe it. But if he could forgive me, I could forgive you. He made me the person I am today. I couldn't have done it without him. I really care about him." 

"He clearly cares about you, too." 

TJ was surprised by Kira's kindness. When he considered it, perhaps Cyrus did reply care about him. He was always there for him, patient and attentive, always listening. TJ had proved he could be there for him, too. However, Cyrus had helped shape him as a person and he'd forever be in his debt for that. Cyrus may never feel romantic feelings towards him, might never love him back, but at least he cared and was the best friend anybody could ever ask for.

"Thanks, Kira. I hope so. I need to talk to him. I'll just get my books from my locker, then I'll find him, I think." 

"Good. In the mean time, I have to sort something out myself..." 

"Good luck, Kira." 

"You, too, TJ. I mean it. I hope things go well between the two of you." 

TJ smiled and Kira left with hope that she could one day become a better person in her heart.

She had one last thing to do. 

She needed to talk to Cyrus.

She moved rapidly across the school, wondering where a person like Cyrus could possibly be. She hardly even knew the guy. A thought came to her suddenly. 

The library. 

He was intelligent-she could tell that he picked up on her passive aggressive nature from the beginning. He seemed to be the book smart type, too. It would only make sense that Cyrus would be there.

Upon entering the library, she spootrf Cyrus dark head instantly. She walked in, tryinf to keep her voice down as she knew that they didn't like people being proud in libraries or something.

"Cyrus?" 

Cyrus turned around at the sudden interruption, his history book abandoned immediately. 

Kira didn't expect him to be in such a state. His face was pale, which juxtaposed dramatically to the dark rings which had formed around his eyes. She certainlydidn't expect the fright in his eyes, or the fear in his voice as he spoke wearily.

"Kira? What are you doing here?" 

Kira took a deep breath. 

"Look. I've been a bad epdosn, tearing you and TJ apart." 

Cyrus shook his head stubbornly. 

"You two have been hitting it off. You make a great couple. You must be really happy together. If it means me spending less time with TJ, then so be it. It's fine. He clearly prefers you to me." 

"No, you don't understand." Kira's voice was frantic. "We're not a couple. We never have been, and we never will be. I'll let TJ explain some of it to you, but I've not been all that nice. To you, to him or to Buffy, if I'm fully honest with you here." 

"I mean, you were very rude to her and the rest of the team. And you've been acting oddly passiveaggressive recently. I didn't want to say it, though. I thought you'd-" Cyrus winced-"hurt me or something. If I'm fully honest with you here, I'm scared of you, Kira." 

Kira's voice softened. 

"Don't be. I'm not here to intimidate you or anything, don't worry." 

"Then why are you here?" 

"We need to talk." 

Cyrus looked concerned but exhausted, so obliged, nd they found a corridor where they could talk privately. 

What had Cyrus done? Had he upset somebody? He was the miserable one, though. Seeing Kira and TJ on the swings together really was the tip of the iceberg. Cyrus had felt his heart shattering into a million pieces. He'd been talking to Buffy just a few minutes ago, actually. She'd been comforting him and encouraging him yo be open with TJ. Cyrus doubted that TJ even cared about his existence anymore. He was too occupied with Kira. Yet, now she was here, confronting him. It was off, but something in her nature suggested a softer side to the girl that Cyrus really hoped to see. He'd only had two hours sleep last night, thus he wasn't capable of dealing with any snarky or rude behaviour on Kira's part. He followed her, albeit reluctantly, and motioned for her to begin speaking.

"I was wrong, on Costume Day. I knew he wanted to do a costume with you and not me. He turned me down twice, but I got into his head. It's his narrative to tell, and I respect him enough not to give you the details, but he's happier around you than when hes is around me, believe me. He was miserable when you left, that time." 

"He was?" 

Cyrus was still uncertain whether or not he could, or even should, ever trust Kira, but something in her tone hinted at authenticity for once.

"Yup. It took me a few seconds of trying to get his attention for him to finally listen to me. He was too intent on looking at you." 

"Oh." 

"Just give him a chance, okay? I was spending too much time with him, not allowing him to hang out with you, which was wrong, I know. I was envious and wished I could be in a relationship as happy as that. I won't get into it now, but I've been through a lot of racism and sexism in the past, and my home life isn't necessarily that great, either. It doesn't justify how I acted, exactly, but I know now that the way I was acting was damaging to both of you. He really cares about you. You should talk to him about this." 

Cyrus sighed. He was still doubtful about how he was perceived, in TJ's eyes, but Kira's words really made him believe that him and TJ could be friends again. Never more, but as long as they were friends again, and they could have fun together, open up to each other, hang out at school and The Spoon and the park, just like old times. 

"Would be even want to talk to me?" 

"You doubt yourself too much, Cyrus. Of course he does. I've spoken to him myself. You two need to discuss what's been going on between you." 

"Fine." Cyrus relented. "I'm glad he wants to tell to me. I thought he didn't." 

Kira smiled. 

"Surprise! He does. Who knows what will come out of it?" 

"That's true." 

"Exactly. And, by the way, I am really sorry for how I've treated you both. I'll let TJ explain some specifics to you, but, like I said, he needs to talk to you. I hope one day you'll forgive me for how I've acted and the mistakes I've made." 

Cyrus' face began to glow.

"Maybe not now, but definitely. And I hope things look up for you, Kira." 

"You too, Cyrus." 

Cyrus head was spinning with confusion. Why was Kira being so friendly and nice? He welcomed it, regardless. 

"Thanks." 

He checked his watch. He had ten minutes that he could salvage, reading the next chapter of his book and to think things through. 

"Is that the time? I've got to go, but I'll see you soon, Kira." 

Kira grinned. 

"See you." 

Her mission was over. But Cyrus' wasn't. Hopefully, he'd find TJ st some point and they could sort everything out between them. 

He was heading back to the library, consumed by thoughts of TJ and the memories created together, how happy they were together. His thoughts were interrupted when he wasn't looking where he was going and bumped into someone. He blinked and snapped back into it.

"I'm so sorry! I wasn't concentrating!" Cyeus began explaining to the stranger, panicking, when he figured out who this elusive stranger was. 

TJ. 

"Underdog, it's fine. No worries. I have a lot on my mind, too. I get it. I was just coming to find you." 

"You were?" 

"I was. I'm so sorry for shutting you out. Kira got into my head, convinced me to not hang out with you. It was a horrible time. I felt so alone without you. I just want you back in my life. I really care about you, Cyrus Goodman."

"You do?" 

"Of course I do. Why would you ever think otherwise, Cyrus?" 

"You didn't show it." 

"I will now. I need you. She took me from you and it was awful. Sure, she had stuff going on, and she's taken responsibility for her actions now, by that doesn't mean that Kira's actions still don't have consequences. However, what you just said is on me. It's my fault that I didn't show you how much I care about you. Im sorry. If you let me back in your life, I will. I promise." 

"You really mean all of that?" 

"Why else would I say it, Underdog? You mean the world to me." 

Cyrus' jaw dropped so low, it was almost at the floor.

"Oh, TJ...you mean so much to me, too, but I never knew how to express it. I thought I'd lost you to her forever. That hurt. I even saw you two on the swings together." 

TJ swallows hard, hurt painted on his face.

"Cyrus. I can assure you now, it was nothing. She bet me I couldn't swing higher. You know how competitive I am." 

Cyrus remembered all the times TJ had raged over losing a board game, and chuckled slightly, nodding in agreement.

"I know. So it didn't mean anything to you?" 

"No. She tainted it. There's a lot to explain." 

"That's alright. I'm always here for you, TJ." 

TJ grinned. 

"Right back at you." 

They shared a soft look and a smile, and Cyrus briefly wondered if perhaps there was chemistry there, after all. 

"Cyrus, can you stay for a bit?" 

"Sure. What is it? Are you okay?" 

Biting his lip, TJ glanced at Cyrus caringly. 

"I have a lot to tell you. You might want to sit down for it." 

"What is it?" 

"I'll tell you in a minute. Let's find somewhere to sit, shall we?" 

"Sure. But why?" 

TJ took a deep breath. It was now or never. 

"We need to talk."

**Author's Note:**

> Don't forget to leave a comment to let me know what you thought if you liked it! (:


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